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Hi, my name is Bindi, i am only 17 yrs old. all my life all i have wanted to be is a mum and i cant wait to have children. i want to start at age 22 or something but so many people tell me that its to youn. i was wondering if you could tell me what age you suggest and how much money you wouldestimately need for a baby per year? is there many mum's out there who start early like 20yrs old? how did you cope with money, people telling you its to young, and what effects did it have on your relationship. i'd really love to hear all your stories to help me... thanks alot,
Bindi xoxo

Bindi, sydney

Hi Bindi,

my name is Tia I fell pregnant with my daughter when i was 19 and had her when I was 20 I am very glad i had her when i did and i have a good job a hubby and we are very happy we bought 2 units and have many other things every thin is acheivable. I am now 25 and ttc #2 but we have had no luck yet, my partner ans i have been together for 7 years and still going strong:)

QLD 5 year old daughter

Hi Bindi!

Im Kath, and when i read your post i smiled coz i remember that when i was 16-17 i realised that i only ever wanted to be a mum-had no real desire for uni or a career!

I got married at 19 pregnant at 20 and first bub at 21. Second baby at 23 and this will be my third at 24!!

If you ask me the most important thing you need is a stable relationship with a GOOD man-not just any guy a GOOD one who wants the same things you do and will be helpful and supportive and work hard for his family!

As far as how we cope with money - its tough. But you budget and make sure you put your monry towards the things you want and need instead of throwing it around on other junk and you can achieve heaps-we have a lovely home and we live comfortably-tight but comfortably!
You get looked at when your pregnant by some older people judging you for being so young but thats somehting you have to overcome and realise that this baby is going to get just as much love as it would if it were to be being born to a 28 year old mother-maybe more!
And the affects on your relationship? Well it puts a strain when you have lots of kids close together as you do struggle to find time for each other and your both very tired and busy but if you go into it all knowing that there are going to be tough times and your both commited to working through those times then youll be fine. The key is making sure that there is very open communication so that when one person is feeling neglected or alone or needs somethign they can freely ask or talk about it rather than go looking for it elsewhere.

Sorry about the novel,
Good luck hon-you sound very mature to seek out advice rather than just do what you want - being a mum is all about doing whats best for your family rather than what you "feel" like so your on the right track!

Kath

Kathryn - Zack-4, Toby-2 & Molly 1

Hey Bindi, i am due to have my first baby in Sept. I think whatever age you are (although young young teen would prob be a bit stressful-just cos ur still growing up etc) as long as you love your child more than life itself, and would do anything for it, then you would make a great mum. I am having my first and i am 27. (im sorry Katherine, i have to disagree with you on a young person loving thier child 'maybe more than a 28 year old- i would love my child whether i was 17, 20 or 30) I, like you have always wanted children and i did want to start young. It didnt work out that way, but that is ok-it was just that i didnt meet the right person back then. I met my husband at 21, and have only fallen pregnant now-this is just the way it worked out. I think you do need to be in a loving relationship-although there are some great single mums out there-as it means you have the support. I think there are alot of young mums around still-and you have to remember that most of our mums had us in there late teens early 20s and this was normal! So dont let people make you feel bad if you do end up being a young mum-but just be careful you dont fall pregnant just for the sake of it- a supportive relationship will be less stress on you and bub! I hope i helped you a little bit, and i hope everything goes well for you.
Hi Bindi,
I really don't think that 22 is too young to start a family. I think it depends on the maturity of the persons wanting to start the family. What Katherine said about a stable relationship is very true. Although there are a lot of single parents out there doing a wonderful job, having a mum and a dad around 24/7 that love each other would be really good!!
A lot of people told me that the baby shouldn't rule your life and I guess it shouldn't but once you have that little bundle there is nothing else in the world more wonderful or important, and they DO rule your life! So if you are a bit of a party girl, like going out till all hours of the night - then forget it! It really isn't fair on bub!
Money wise - you really need to set yourself a budget. Write a list of all the things you need to set up for a baby and then write a list of all the things you will need for day to day use - n@ppies, formula (don't automatically assume you will B/F as it sometime just wont happen!) wipes, medical visits, clothing, food, the list goes on! At the moment my little one is nearly 20 months and we would spend about $60 a week on her, and we use disposables.
I still feel very strong on the relationship side of things though - it is easy to split a relationship, marriage - but not so easy to split an innocent child!
Best wishes Bindi, your life will never be the same once you do have a child, instead it will be filled with a love you never knew existed.
Tanya (I'm 28 by the way, and love my girl more than anyone can describe!)

DD1 July 2004 DD2 August 2007 DS September 2009

I was 17 with my first.. single when he was born then when he was 9 weeks old met my partner who was a single dad of a 1 year old then.. so gained a stepson... then 19 when I had 'our 3rd' and will be 20 having our 4th in 1.5- 2months from now it seems.

I think 22 is a great age to start a family, I certainly wouldn't reccommend starting under 20 though (sounds a bit hypercritical but its not easy and although being a mother is wonderful you do miss out on growing up and discovering who you really are...)

Most ppl have a fit when they 'find out' I'm only 20 with a family this big already. But its what we wanted. If health would permit we would have one more child but we can't and as it stands I'll probably be getting my tubes tied when this baby is born because the risk is too great to my health.

Financially - I have no idea how much a baby costs 'per year' but I know its a lot. You manage though. Whatever your income is, if you want children you will manage fine. Anyone thats REALLY worried about money would never have a child in the first place because the cost factor would be so daunting.

If anyone criticises your decision ignore them, its your life and by then you will be an adult and fully capapble of making your own decision.

Make sure you know your full medical history before trying to concieve. I knew nothing about mine and should have as I have a history of pre-eclampsia which would have been useful to know bout before hand.

For now though, life your life to the full.. enjoy yourself you're still a teen and have plenty of living and discovering to do. These years are when you really discover who YOU are. What makes you, you.

Goodluck,

Charmaine

ps if you'd like to chat my msn is coyote_ugly1885@hotmail.com

Sav 1y Bella 2y Zach 4y Alex 5y TTC#5

Hi Bindi,
I really don't think that 22 is too young to start a family. I think it depends on the maturity of the persons wanting to start the family. Although there are a lot of single parents out there doing a wonderful job, having a mum and a dad around 24/7 that love each other would be really good!!

A lot of people told me that the baby shouldn't rule your life and I guess it shouldn't but once you have that little bundle there is nothing else in the world more wonderful or important, and they DO rule your life! So if you are a bit of a party girl, like going out till all hours of the night - then forget it! It really isn't fair on bub!

Money wise - you really need to set yourself a budget. Write a list of all the things you need to set up for a baby and then write a list of all the things you will need for day to day use - n@ppies, formula (don't automatically assume you will B/F as it sometime just wont happen!) wipes, medical visits, clothing, food, the list goes on! At the moment my little one is nearly 20 months and we would spend about $60 a week on her, and we use disposables.

I still feel very strong on the relationship side of things though - it is easy to split a relationship, marriage - but not so easy to split an innocent child!

Best wishes Bindi, your life will never be the same once you do have a child, instead it will be filled with a love you never knew existed.

Best wishes, World Center of Baby
https://www.worldcenterofbaby.com

hi Bindi.
i fell pregnant at 17 and had my son at 18. my partner and i had planned for him. my partner is also 7 years older than me.

i would not change this for the world. and our son is about to be a teenager.

my one piece of advice is too be who you are first. know who you are as a person. live your own life a little.

you will know when it is right for you and your partner and that's all that matters. if there is love you will make it work and you will be fine.

money wise, yes it will be tough and expensive but that's just how it is.

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